“The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down” (Proverbs 14:1).
The author of Proverbs 31 makes some interesting observations and comments about women who are good wives. In verses 11 and 12 he says, “Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.”
In other words, according to this author, the characteristic of a good wife is loyalty and faithfulness. Be loyal to your husband and always be careful to show him respect in the presence of other people. Also be careful what you say about him when he is not present.
Nothing distresses anyone more than hearing someone they thought they could trust saying uncomplimentary things about them. If we are disloyal to our husbands by criticizing them to other people, it will hurt them very much. It will also hurt us.
If we complain about our husbands to others we are “tearing down our house.” If our husbands hear us speaking about them in a demeaning way, they will stop trusting us. If they do not trust us, we cannot expect to have a satisfactory marriage relationship. They will never tell us what they are thinking, or trust us with money or other things they value.
The next time you start to complain to someone about your husband, stop and think about it first. Do you really need to talk about your frustrations? Can you trust this person not to tell anyone? Why not just take your problems to the Lord in prayer? It is safer that way. You will not cause gossip and it will not destroy your husband’s trust in you.
Kimberly Snider is a missionary to the Philippines.
From “Moments for Moms,” a free email subscription.
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