A Favorite Child

“But if you show favoritism, you sin” (James 2:9, NIV).

Recently, I read a true story of an Asian woman who became a doctor in the United States. There were eight children in her family, but she was the only one who was unloved. Her mother had died giving birth to her, and her brothers, sisters and father could not forgive her.

This woman had a miserable childhood spent at boarding school, while the other children lived happily at home with their father and his new wife. When her father died, she was the only one who inherited nothing.

Although she is successful now, this physician says she still battles feelings of rejection on a daily basis. She still hurts because she has never felt the love of her family.

If you have more than one child, the temptation to show favoritism may be something you fight. Sometimes a child’s personality matches yours more than another child’s. Sometimes one child demands more time than the others. If you have only one girl, or only one boy among your children, you may be tempted to favor that child. If one child is much younger than the others, you may spoil her.

Understand this: if you favor one child, the others feel deep pain. Favoritism negatively affects families, causing jealousy and disunity.

If you have a tendency to favor a child, ask God to help you love your children equally—even if one seems more deserving. Loving each child wholeheartedly is your job as a mother. It is not your job to choose which child is best.

Love comes from God. He has an abundant supply to give to you, so you can give to others.

Kimberly Snider is a missionary to the Philippines.

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Copyright (c) 2005 Women’s Ministries of the Assemblies of God.

Maxim of the Moment

The bonds of matrimony don’t profit you unless the interest is kept up.