What is the most dangerous place for a person or a couple? Isolation. What do people and couples tend to do when they experience trouble? Isolate themselves.
We tend to think that we are alone and no one else in the world experiences the problems and trouble we experience. It is not true and it is a lie from the pit of Hell meant to keep you from getting help! I have to tell you that one of the benefits to counseling couples is that it keeps my wife and I grounded in that fact that we are not alone. There are times in counseling, we look at each other with that “knowing” look of that is us also. Folks, every healthy couple experiences trouble and conflict in their marriage. Everyone experiences problems in life.
Often we will hear some form of 1 Corinthians 13 in wedding ceremonies, but what about 1 Corinthians 7:28? Paul wrote; “those who marry will face many troubles in this life.” We don’t hear this fact of married life before or during the wedding, but certainly experience it and then we are not prepared for it. We think that no one else has the problems we have. That myth is perpetrated by the mask people wear to church, making everyone think we have no problems. How can the Body of Christ fulfill Christ’s law of carrying each other’s burdens, if we are not open and honest with each other? (Galatians 6:2) NO couple has it all together. No one has a perfect marriage. The most godly people we know experience problems in their marriages. Every healthy marriage has issues.
Jesus said that in this world, we will have trouble, but we can take heart because He has overcome the world (John 16:33). The difference between healthy couples and unhealthy couples is the way that they work through their problems. Healthy couples work together to resolve their problems and will humble themselves and seek guidance when necessary. We are not meant to go through life alone, even as a couple. We were created for relationship and community. There is power in meeting together with another couple or couples in an open, honest relationships.
First, learning that we are not alone is paramount. Secondly we can learn better ways to handle our problems when we are willing to ask for help.
Do not isolate, connect with other couples who love the Lord and who will pray with you for wisdom to resolve marital conflicts.
Used by permission – Fortified Marriages.